I’ve blogged about my first birth story. To say that it was traumatic is putting it mildly. At the time that I wrote the post I had still not come to terms with it, nor what exactly made it as traumatic as it was. Probably one of the biggest things I’ve had to do in order to prepare for the birth of my second child is come to terms with this previous birth experience. Continue reading “Recovering from a Bad Birth Experience”
My dear little boy,
It’s been a week since you started school. I was so worried that you would be too young. Daddy and I talked to you a lot about school leading up to the big first day. We were worried that you would be scared, confused or lonely. We were worried that you would not understand why we left you alone with strangers in a new scary place. Continue reading “My Dear Boy Started School “
Warning this post is long and a bit graphic…
Part of the reason that I have been posting less on my blog lately is because my pregnancy has brought up a lot of unresolved memories from my first pregnancy and birth. I have been struggling to bring myself to write this specific post because I have not yet come to terms with what happened. Also my approaching birth of baby number two has given the trauma a new lease on life. I can’t push it to the back of my mind.
I don’t know why I am writing this. Maybe because it has been on my mind a lot lately. It happened 2 years ago. 29 October 2014 to be exact. I have never shared this story in as much detail before. I suppose maybe because it’s a side of pregnancy that I never expected or gave much thought to before I fell pregnant. That the symptoms are not the difficult part of pregnancy, and if they are then you are lucky. There are other scary things like miscarriage, birth defects, what they call high risk pregnancies, premature labour and so on. These types of issues are not really something people often discuss.
Don’t read on if you can’t handle graphic information.
I am part of a number of mommy groups online and can I tell you what shocks me the most? The sheer number of posts about father’s behaving badly and women asking advice about how to deal with them. The issues range from cheating, porn and strippers to men who do not stick up for their wifes. Absent fathers. Father’s who do not help out around the house or share child rearing responsibilities. And do you know how often fellow moms use the response, “Boys will be boys”? Too often!!!
That saying that it taking a village to raise a child is so true. I am eternally grateful to my village. A big shout out to the old friends and new friends who have been by my side through the late nights, doctors visits, hospital trips, returning to work and dealing with all the new challenges that come with being a mother. I am so grateful for those Whatsapps at 3am when my mom friends were also all awake for a feed. For pediatrician and nurse recommendations. For not having had to cook a single meal in the first month of my child’s life. I am grateful for the people who came and helped clean my house when I was still recovering from my cesarian and adjusting to motherhood while at the same time having visitors flow through the front door more steadily than ever before. I am thankful for the people that picked up my workload and enabled me to have my precious maternity leave. Over and over I have been blessed with acts of kindness from the people around me. Friends are a real lifeline. Continue reading “It Takes a Village”
A friend of mine said to make a list about how I planned to parent and then read it for a laugh a year or two down the line. There are many things on that list that totally did not happen as planned (that is a story for another day) but one of them was that I was not going to lose friends just because I was now a parent. Long story short, I totally did.